This Is All That Matters
by Elf Asato
Summary: [TsuHi] Hisoka reflects during a thunderstorm...


**Title**: This Is All That Matters

**Author**: Elf Asato

**Created/Finished**: 11:47 PM 1/31/03 – 12:45 AM 2/1/03

**Warnings**: Actually, this was inspired by 80's Flashback Friday on the radio station ^^;;  That's my warning.  Oh yes, and sap.  @_@

**Pairing**: Tsu/Hi

**Disclaimer**: …I think that if I have twenty dollars, I'm rich.  Now does it sound like I own these gorgeous characters?__

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This Is All That Matters

By Elf Asato

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He's so warm.

I can't help but feel so relaxed when I touch him, despite the horrid storm outside…  The rhythm of his breathing, the warmth of his emotions…comforting me even as he sleeps, the radio drowning out (if only slightly) the outside world, …and most of all, his touch calms me.

If feels like everything's right when I'm here with him.  No work, no death, no troubles, no Muraki, no Hijiri, no demons…just us.  Together – holding each other in an embrace while the storm rages on outside.

I don't care about it anymore.  I'm not scared…at least, not when he's with me.

I want to think this is love.

I snuggle up next to him, pressing against him harder as I allow myself to listen to his soothing, rhythmic breathing.  The radio acts like a background and combined with him, it sounds like a beautiful ballad.  Sung just for me.  Only me.  Me. 

I would never want him to know this, but I love being with him this way.  Lately, I've wanted to do this every night.  I wonder what he'd think of it…  Of me.

I want to tell him I love him…but I'm not sure what love is.

I want to do more than just tell him…but of course, those are my teenage hormones…

To tell you the truth, I'm not all that scared of thunderstorms anymore.  Our first couple of nights together completely erased that fear from my mind…but I want him with me so bad.

He shifts slightly in his sleep, putting an arm around me and pulling me closer.  My heart races.

I love that.

I have the feeling he isn't exactly all the way asleep.  I think…he's waking up…

This particular night, I didn't wait for him to invite me over to his bed…  I came on my own will after the thunderstorm started, turning on the radio to try to detract from the horrible noise…  I wonder what he'll think.

His breathing becomes calmer, more controlled…and I know he's awake, if only vaguely.  I bury my face into his neck, taking in his scent…

I love everything about him.

"Anyone wearing a bra gets a free drink," the radio announces.  Did I hear that right? [1]

"I wanna bra," Tsuzuki yawns, still half-asleep.

I chuckle slightly, "Baka," …but to my annoyance, it comes out very loving and affectionate.

He wraps his arm around me further and presses me tightly against him, rolling over halfway in the process so that he's nearly crushing me.

"Mm…listen," he mutters, pressing his face against my cheek.

I listen…and I all hear is the radio playing, along with his hot breath in my ear…

…That's just so sexy…

Naturally, when I hear the absence of the storm outside, I don't want to leave.

"Storm's gone," he mutters again…and for a second, I think he's going to kick me out of his bed, but he says, "…But now I'm scared."

I don't argue and I don't question him.  I just leave it at that and hug him tighter.  We're clutching each other so tightly that it's like we'll be lumped into one.

"…I'm going to be scared tomorrow night, too…and the next…and…every night…" he rambles on.

My heart beats rapidly at his words and a single violet eye opening lazily to look at me almost…lovingly.  "…Afraid of what?"

He shifts and buries his head in my neck with his lips against my skin, breathing softly.  "…Afraid of nights without you."

My breath catches and my throat goes dry.  I can't speak properly so all I can do is rub his shoulders…caressing…

He sighs and plants a soft kiss on my neck – and it feels like my skin's on fire.  Another one.  I'm burning.

If he keeps on kissing me, I don't know what I'll do.

He keeps on doing it and won't stop…so the only think of is to moan softly and kiss his shoulders.

We take it slow, though, because I know we'll be spending nearly an eternity together after this night.

I could never let him be afraid.

I don't know if this is love…but I know I want his happiness and to me…this is all that matters.

~Owari~

@_@  The sap monster got me.  Can you tell?  Ooh, and sorry this is so short and a little choppy…

[1] I seriously heard that on the radio…@_@


End file.
